where do we go from here.

You just told me it would take a little silence. for now. with no apparent hint of a consequence within a timeframe and nary a clue if that statement was already intimate with forever. or perhaps I just didn't understand then. I don't know if gave in too soon, and used logic to decide. But I guessed not, only wanting you to be beautiful and I did not want rain in your face. Not to trouble, not to disturb and to just let you be. Even if I wanted your embrace. At that time.
And at this time. And
Everyday now.
And mostly at night. And just after I come home from work.

I do understand, my mind does. Entirely. My mind, my mind does...
But the other part though surreal is even more real, and only wants you.

I just have been to the cold and back again; and being there I still kept crossing out the passing days, keeping time, keeping count, that... that it would mean my life if I didn't; if I didn't keep the faith; if I didn't think slash feel about you.

And that is the easy part, mostly effortless. It was stepping on the brakes that was problematic.

Now, I am all twisted up as I can ever be.
and even just reading the wiki summary of the The Science of Sleep can make me cry.